Vincent The Dragon

ok...so, you were online with your old accounts...The ones i deleted months ago when i asked about them and you told me you were never going to use them again. I should have known better than to expect contact on the account we have always contacted each other on before. apparently the same goes for email, i should have somehow known not to use the one we have used in the past...you know..just somehow..I am supposed to know you may have missed my calls to you when your Cell was off. I was supposed to know that you said you would talk to me on a certain day but you decided not to...wow, sorry, my bad.

Lets turn back the clock here a month ago...The last thing my friend said to me prior:
”hey hun sorry i missed our work out Wednesday i didnt realise i wasnt logged into my yahoo till you had already went, ill be going over to ty's for the weekend so i wont be here for todays work out, ill make sure monday is free so we can go then.
talk to you when i get back.”

the monday in question freind would say:
“thank you Vincent for being my friend and thank you for doing all that you have done for me. I feel like my life has changed in a different direction than where it was in the past. I am sorry to say I feel it best if we should part ways...”

What I would have said:
“Thank you Kaz for being my friend, and thank you for all that you have done for me. I am sad and disappointed that I will not be in your life anymore, but I understand and wish you the best of luck in your future direction. Know that I will be here if you have need of me, and I will remember you always.”

Instead you took a different approach and rationalized to yourself and those you choose to have changed for that you are the victim of me....so be it then...I would however like to say thank you

thank you for going camping with me

thank you for showing me how to make a mean gin and tonic

thank you for sowing me that people can be ashamed of being near me

thank you for letting me buy you cloths

thank you for taking me to the Y

thank you for playing video games with me even though we are completely different at it

thank you for showing me friends don't confide in me

thank you for letting me work on your computer and your car

thank you for pointing out my weaknesses

thank you for kissing me

thank you for letting me kiss you

thank you for letting me do your homework until 12am while you go on a date

thank you for being there for me when I was broken hearted

thank you for showing me I can still be romantic

thank you for letting me be there when you were broken hearted

Thank you for being the first guy I took as a date to my fathers

thank you for showing me that friendships mean little

thank you for showing me I could be passionate

thank you for telling me we had no sparks

thank you for introducing me to music I have not heard before

thank you for letting me take you to a club

thank you for staying at my house for weeks and not offer to pitch in

thank you for letting me pay your room at AC

thank you for showing me I can have dreams

thank you for giving me thoughtful gifts

thank you for meeting my friends, online and off

thank you for not letting me meet most of your friends

thank you for showing me that dreams can be false hopes

thank you for showing me that even best friends will hurt you

thank you for reminding me that people are selfish and forgetting

thank you for being incapable of ending a relationship with any modicum of decency

You have changed, changed with every new person you encountered in your life, you changed in odd and quick directions but you failed to grow. You failed to take those experiences and say thank you for them. Someday you may.
Good bye my friend, may you find your path.

i got something really neat for my birthday, something i wanted a lot, only better.
Mom got me Metroid Prime Trilogy (^_^)
I did get what i actually asked for as well, truck mats.

its been a month since Kaz decided to close his eyes and pretend i don't exist...this is BullShit...i deserve Something!
i had to track down his new BF and send him and email, this should get his attentions or like the email said...i come knocking on the door and neither kaz nor his parents are ready for that exchange.

ok, so Bill has this really nice 1080p TV - big sucker
with my help he now has a really kicken signal processor too (7.1)
so, he has assembled over the past few months all this plus some nice PC parts to build a really good HTPC.

ok..so we installed windows on it, no problems things work ok...on to Ubuntu....
OK...so overscan is off- i knew that would happen although i had hoped the fact that the TV being and LCD this issue would not be.
buuut...Ubuntu refuses to see his Nvidia 9500 videocard in a way that makes installing the non-default restricted drives a pain.

So, got the driver installed (Nvidia REALLY should have some, you know directions...) It's fun because you have to remove the original drivers with you have to do without the gui running or X

OK, got that working...no..before we go into the custom screen resolution for over scan, lets get sound working (HDMI with digital audio passthru)..OK thats not hard...back to the display ... making all kings of Modeline resolution changes and its not doing anythingto the display...now...if you dont know this yopu have to do this wiht out the gui running and without X, editing a file in nano (command line file editor) turn on X (but you dont have a gui) and see what your #'s did...then back and forth and back and forth and..Why is this not changing??? ... >_> oh...hey, lets check the tv's settings..oh..look lets turn off this force centering thing and use the "just is" setting...wow...OK, no special modelines needed but we kept the custom Xorg file anyway...waiiit, now sound is broken...

Well..put the xorg file back to its default and sound works again.
Buuut...system will not browse his windows workgroup, Secondlife refuses to launch with a really odd error, compiz will not install, flash video crashes, Boxee crashes on startup.... -_- ... So...setting up the machine to upgrade to 9.04 up from 8.10 up from 8.04 and Hoping like heck that Bluetooth will still work and that these oddities will clear up a bit

..ummm..nothing...

I don't know what to say or where to begin; I am … I feel betrayed and worthless and hurt.

Maybe my feelings for him was a fair amount more than just calling him my best friend, which I did. I knew he was flaky, others told me the same. But. He held me when I cried, I was there for him when he needed the same, we explored ourselves against the other, I took him places, he went with me to mine, I took him to see my dad, I helped him with schoolwork, he gave me gifts, we talked of living together and had elaborate plans, I bought him things, he spent weeks here, we have been naked on his parents bed, watched movies, played games, music...without talking to me and when I needed him the most, struggling with issues; he removed himself from my life and I don't even know why...

It hurts

Thank you Scott for telling me to type

What measure of self do you imposed
when life betrays you time and again?
What purpose do you find when you look inside
and see only fleeting moments of light?
What do you do?
Where should you go?

i came home early. The soaking rain did not bother me, it's a gimme when camping any way.
Fishing was good..i caught several trellis rigs, a large led weight, a fishing lure, half of a really old style coke can...

The lakes overfill valve is STILL broken so the lake levels are a shadow of what they should be.

The place was full of people, mostly in 2 large groups. I don't mind but the sounds of partying when your alone poking at the fire at night only make you sadder.

I did have some fun with the 2 guys that camped next to me. They were bow hunters but were...mmm...lets put it this way, they finally got a fire started after but putting logs into their charcoal grill...

It was nice to get outside and watch the full moon rise to a clear sky, only interupted by the red sparks dancing from my camp fire...but...Camping is better when it's not just you and the dog.

packing up to go fishing for the weekend at the lake again.

The garage now has a computer...old AMD 900 Mhz, running Xubuntu. Its good enough to access the mp3s on the server so i have music while i am tooling around out there; but what it does rather well and speedy is run programs that live on my main workstation via SSH -x .
So, i can run Open Office, Firefox and my IM client a bazzillion times faster remotely than that old thing will do locally and the AMD will not melt down when the temp in the garage is 85.

Finishing up my first birdhouse. I'd like to sell them. Actually, i think it is neat to build them in replica of your house. This first one is a mini-my Lair. I plan on making both hanging types and bigger ones that go on poles....now to find customers...

well...i noticed something that went bonkers on the blog update...the galleries are not working that were there before the update (after ones are working)
i dont really know what happened, i have all the images backed up but...

either i edit a bunch of entries in the SQL or i reupload the pics

It is likely that i will just re-upload. The blogs don't contain that many pics other than the House project; and that still needs re-done so....

The saw is actually a good (one of the VERY few) friend of mines.
He doesn't have the space for it.
Lucky me ^_^

It's like 15 years old but has a new motor and is in great shape.
The fence is a mostly universal design so it fits more or less.
Everything works well except there is no way to make the distance gauge line up, thats a minor issue that i can repair some other day.

Read more »

Bio pages are now done...less one page and some pics

first time i sat in the chair in a very long while without a laptop.
Generally i take the opportunity to write things.
...
No wall of text this time; i have nothing new to add at the moment.

Wiring the garage for phone...and might as well run a few more wires while i am at it.

This took all day to dig and pipe the trench -_-
Another 2 to do the wiring runs and get it all patched in and cleaned up.
I took the opportunity to pull the wires from the phone company drops off the side of the house and encapsulate them into the pipe as well. I like clean wiring...

So, now the garage has a phone, it will be an un-powered phone for when the power goes out. If we have ice storms again, the garage has a wood burner in it. Now it also has hard wired Internet so i can access my music and lookup things (like woodworking projects) or have an IM client running while i am in the garage fiddling.

Also added Coax for the T.V. just in case.

[evo_gallery]465726421878125[/evo_gallery]

Read more »

the site is being upgraded so things will be a bit off.

comments and postings are still enabled and welcomed; only the look of the site has changed, for now.