Vincent The Dragon

We now have DirectTV.
Ever since over air TV went digital we have not had much luck with it and i gave up trying to work out an antenna system so we only used the DVD player (now a Blu Ray), the HTPC and Netflix for home entertainment. Movies are great but they are once in a while things. The HTPC is hampered by slow Internet out here and the servers hard drive space needing serious upgrading that I can't afford and Netflix just kinda sucks for the most part.

The shiny new dish hidden behind the house out of sight is thanks to Will's determination in being smoke free. Cigs are expensive and the money saved pays for the dish and more. I know he is not %100 smoke free but i am proud of him for what he has done so far. Smoking is hard to stop so if you are a friend of his, encourage him.

We will be stopping the netflix and I am going to kill the home phone...we NEVER use the damn thing and now that its VOIP if the power goes out so does the phone and they have added a new Cell tower in the area so our cell phones work in the house. As such, I don't see the point in having the home phone.

I don't know what is going on at work. Something chained when the last new technician quit; he went all off on the bosses and let them know what is all fucked up about this place. There was an immediate about face and things were going pretty good but it's quickly slipping back into crap. Not surprisingly right after hiring a new guy (this behavior has happened every time i get someone new). Guy has been here less than a month and already letting his manager (me) know that this place is a shit hole. Now, there seems to be some behind the scenes little meetings between employees and the boss, people are giving me the cold shoulder and leaving me out of the decision making processes; I am being treated like a simple technician rather than a manager...Something is going on, My techs are loyal to me and have expressed some concern but are trying hard not to just come out and say it. Likely they are were told something in secret and were told to keep it that way.

At any rate, the search for a different job is ongoing but there is nothing out there that pays anything...You can't live on a $12.00/hr job.

http://www.videobash.com/video_show/classical-drumming-1017392

Polk Audio PSW10 10-Inch Monitor Series Powered Subwoofer
(^_^)

The subwoofer on the DTS system has been broken for what seems like years. My BF bought me a new one for my birthday...Its awesome

Summary judgment, garnishment of %25 of your income...
Welcome to america, you have 3 choices.
1) below poverty but since thats rewarded by tons of government programs you may well live better and have more things than most people. You may not have 'money' but there are very few trailer trash red neck domiciles that I see that don't have a satellite dish bolted to the side. Your school, medical, food, utilities are subsidized or paid for by choice 3.
2) Rich...you can be rich and stay that way because you make enough or have enough to take advantage of all the loop holes or can get most of your living expenses taken care of by hiding things inside other costs.
3) Middle class...working poor...the people that make this country go, we do all the real work, foot all the bills and are taxed beyond our fair share.

I have nothing, no savings, no retirement, nothing towards entertainment or material things.

People keep telling me that's its all bull shit and I should be able to file for assistance or bankruptcy.
Well...no, I can't … Things that don't count against my out cost of living are the things that don't go towards my life. The country we live in doesn't acknowledge same sex anything, and the state we live in doesn't really either...can't claim him as a dependent because he claims dependents himself...food, phone, stuff for the car like parts and gas that he can't afford because nobody can live on an entry level wage must get removed from the equation. Corporate america has made it so that ALL jobs are entry level. Hell I got let go from my last job because of my paycheck, they fired everyone then re-hired at entry level wages and its the same everywhere I look. Tons of jobs on-line...all entry level pay for technical jobs requiring college level education...

I see no way out
I see nothing in the future
I have lost

Late Sunday evening I go downhill fast. I have been feeling a bit off for a bit but...
104 degree temp and Will finds me in bed mostly out of it..Ambulance ride!

I still feel off, the hospital says its viral but doesn't know what it is...take Tylenol and just deal with it...It will burn out or get worse.

They could not save him...he passed away during the procedure to unblock his urinary tract...his bladder burst, went into shock and passed away.
...
Good bye IT, you were loved.
You were a gentile soul and we will miss your soft purring and snuggles.

One of my cats seems in discomfort. He is not moving well and gets up and moves about a foot then lays back down, wobbely and stiff. Yesterday he was visiting the litter box alot to pee but did not pee much and was groweling when he cleaned himself. I figgured UTI but now his breath is a but sour, slobbering a little and has labored breathing. I found a few clear vomits on the floor. I don't hear any fluid in his lungs. I can't get him to eat or drink...no way i can take off work to bring him to the vet abd we dont have the money...if there is anything anyone can do..please help me save my cat.

Been thinking about what to update on...nothing new...just getting poorer and poorer.
Save money cutting out things...life just gets more expensive in response.

It does not help that we are making payments on things for other people...never again will we help or assist family; it bites us in the ass Every fucking time.

We live here on the charity of others, can't even afford to stand on our own as is.

I am so tired of it.
ready to give up.
I am a manager and i make less now that what i started at my old job and it had benefits and a bonus structure.

Money is still not there.
saving some by dropping my car insurance to state minimum.
Also, I am not on Will's medical insurance as the place he work allows same sex domestic partners on the insurance. Thats going to help a little. My pay will go down since I will no longer be getting a stipend added to my check to help with health care but it will still save about $150 a month and also the deductible will be less so mebe we can get out of this hole or mebe i can afford to find a job somewhere else.

On a good note, we went and saw the new Start Trek movie. It was pretty damn good, I like hoe they gave several nods to us old school fans and incorporated lots of things from the original time line. The plot of the movie was not as riveting as its old school counterpart but all in all it was a good movie.

Bills i can't pay this pay check:
State tax estimate $100
Phone/cellphone/internet $285
small credit card i have but the bank shutoff because my credit is in the shit can $25
medical credit card used for dental expenses (WAY past due on 6 month checkup) $50

now..i did pay my medical insurance but it was a few days late...so they canceled my coverage.
I send off a very detailed response to the lawyers suing me on behalf of the hospital for like $12,000 i still own them stating pretty much that i expect to go at least $5000 in the red this year...Their response is to file for a default judgment against me...You pay now!

So...why try anymore?...why work?...why bother trying to live?

we are having ramen noodles and boiled eggs for supper and for some reason thats beyond me, i will wake up tomorrow and go to work.

Soo...apparently the Dragon is a size 4 in 'girl'

Near the lilac bush; in between her friends Miss Duster and Mr. Speckles we laid to rest FancyLu. Friend, Companion, Loved one, Family member ..she touched many lives and we will see her smiling face and wagging tail again some day. For now we have our memories.

Good bye for now FancyLu.

The reality of the situation is...i need $400 by the 15th or the check i am sending for state taxes will bounce.

4 Months of 'saving' money by not paying for the credit cards, buying not much in the way of food and just generally doing zero extra activities and i have enough to cover the state taxes i owe but only if i pull every bit of money i have together and that leaves zero dollars for gas and food for the next week and a half.

I was hoping to have been able to save...something...even after my raise i cant afford anything for my self...I don't go anywhere, i don't do anything, i don't have friends..all i do is work, clean and cook and spend a little time in SecondLife which is not all that great since i need a video card and eye glasses.

I am getting the short end of the stick here and i don't know how much longer i can take it and keep smiling.