Vincent The Dragon

I am actually glad that my mandatory vacation time is now, for some reason i have had a clarity of thought that i have not enjoyed in some time now. My imagination is alive and well, it's probably a prelude to a thought bothering me that i might be coming out of remission and back into the more icky parts of the Crohn's disease i have. i think the clarity i have enjoyed has been sparked somewhat by the JadeClaw game i am involved with via a chat session. It's rather late night and by then my mind has had time to lower the defenses and screens i seem to erect so i can (dys)function in daily life. Somehow i don't think i will get all the projects done that i had planned to do. The two i really need to do are replacing the window in the dining room and changing the transmission fluid in my truck.

My new favorite band is Blue October and this one hurts

Black Orchid
Have you ever been so lonely, No one there to hold? Pull me in or disown me, And then climb inside.
My arms are open wide.Have a look inside.

It is not that I am scared to learn, Why I'm empty inside. hold my hand or show some concern, If I live or die. My eyes are open wide. Help me look inside.

I hear the water drip from the faucet. It's sweetly falling in tune. I'm gently closing the closet. I fall to the floor, and crawl to my room. The thought of ending it soon...Just let me sleep in my room.

Hear me cry! cry! Cry! I hear a knock at the front door. Don't come in! I try to look at you But I can't stop shaking. Leave me alone. Just go away. Mother I'm so scared.

Empty bed and all of the sheets are gone, They're wrapped around me and you. All is quiet but the drop of a gun. I want to belong...to someone...But maybe life's not for everyone.